Now that I've had a day or so to reflect, the reality of California, Arizona and Florida has set in. Not to mention Arkansas.
Was I so blind to think that our country's stance on equality was moving forward? In 2004, 11 states passed bans on same-sex marriage. This year, another three, with California's official decision being announced just today. Here I thought things were getting better, and maybe I was a little too optimistic. Plus, last night I just found out that my own sister and brother-in-law probably voted for the ban on same-sex adoptions in Arkansas. And my sister was adopted.
I just don't understand.
Some straight people talk about how gay people being able to marry undermines their own marriages; cheapens them, if you will. I feel the opposite. The fact that my boyfriend Dan and I could decide to get married today on a whim and have it done as soon as we wish lies in sharp contrast to the fact that couples who have been together for 20 or 30 years cannot do it in most parts of this country. The marriage inequality in our country cheapens my right to marry and, I think, cheapens marriage as a whole.
How can people celebrate their right to marry and invite their gay friends to celebrate with them? That'd be like holding an election day party pre-Civil War and inviting black people. For me, it wouldn't feel like a celebration. It'd be like I was throwing my rights in their faces.
Sometimes, my boss tells me that there are some things I just can't understand because I'm young. I think she's right. I've never experienced the outright hatred and prejudice against LGBTs that she has. I know it's out there, but I've been sheltered from it thus far - even insomuch as seeing it happen to anyone I know. She comes from an era where same-sex marriage wasn't even an idea, let alone a possibility. For my gay friends today, it's something that most of them hope for in their future. As we're all getting into our mid-twenties now and straight friends of mine are beginning to get engaged and married, I can't help but wonder what it feels like to watch your friends reach the age of marriage and know that you can't have what they have.
It breaks my heart.
You wanna know?
- Jess
- 24. Acts like 17. Rock music lover. Sometimes avid runner. Clothing- and shoe-obsessed. Beer enthusiast. Writer. Karaoke queen. Often ridiculous and intermittently nonsensical. Grammar snob. LGBT ally. Politics lover. Cat lady. Thesaurus whore.
7 comments:
OMG... I can't believe they passed Prop 8. it put a rather significant damper on the evening's festivities...
Yo Gabba Gabba still rocks!!!
or should I say..
YoGabbaGabbastillrocks!!
Every time I read about this issue or even think about it, I just feel like my country - the place where we are all supposed to be "free" - has betrayed me and is simply being downright prejudice.
What the hell ever happened to the separation of church and state? Marriage isn't a religious bond of any kind, in my eyes. IT CAN BE. But, it's technically not. Two atheists can be married at the Justice of the Peace, as you said - on a whim, and never look back. But we can't be married because it undermines the core value of marriage? WTF?
My heart has been broken for a while, now...
Well put, Jess. I'm heartbroken, too :(
Our country is still full of close minded, ignorant people. I actually have heard some "republicans" make comments like "we should sell the east and west coast to Canada, they aren't real Americans."
Really? Well many European nations have changed throughout time, why should we be stuck in this static mindset based on "morals" that are outdated. The downfall of our country won't be because we have a black president, or because gays can marry. It will be because the extremist, the closed minded religious conservatives are going to continue to start shit abroad to force their views on others. You know there are other people who do that, the extremist so called "Muslim" terrorists.
Things are slowly changing though, it is unfortunate that proposal 8 passed, feels like a step backward. But one day in the foreseeable future everyone will have equal rights. We will get there.
Yo Jess....Where is your Blogga Blogga today? Or, in short...
Yo...Blogga, Blogga!!!
I attempted to leave you a cute anonymous comment when I realized my name was in bright blue letters at the top and linked to my e-mail address. I'll try harder next time.
Love ewe.
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